I have a business plan thats already written However it's not where I think it c

I have a business plan thats already written However it’s not where I think it c

I have a business plan thats already written However it’s not where I think it could be. I am
looking for help in rewriting the business plan to include a little more and to show more clarity and personalized ideas for the company. I have received feedback about the Business plan I’ll add it to this.
The Feedback:
It is too general, it reads like a conceptual idea, needs more details to be implemented.
How are you delivering the “genuine connections and unwavering encouragement” this seems to be the brand differentiator, however except for a mention of using social media there is no clear explanation on how to achieve this. Again, feels like a conceptual idea.
Graph on page 15 does not list source. It is not a statistic; it is a graph.
It ends after offline marketing, somehow abruptly.
I am starting a new career and its taking alot of my time as of right now and a longer time to finish. I am drained after trainings. I will provide you with any form of help that you may need as far as my ideas go and the vision I have for the company.
Im looking for editing services and an additional 5 pages towards the 24 pages thats being provided. Thankyou in advance! I have attached the Business plan below